Tag Archives: government

Rant: Why “Emissions Inspection” Has Nothing To Do With Clean Air, and Everything To Do With Government Corruption

I just failed “vehicle emissions inspection” on my 2000 Blazer.  What is Emissions Inspection, you might ask?

Lucky.

Under the Clean Air Act (1990), states are required to implement vehicle emission inspection programs in metropolitan areas whose air quality does not meet federal standards.
Wikipedia

Some states have opted out – and all of them should.  Here’s why:

If your vehicle is pre-1975, you’re exempt

old-vw-van

Wait…  So, if you’re driving a truck that was built before companies added counter-pollution measures, you don’t have to get tested.  You could be commuting in a 1970 VW van that leaves a smoke trail rivaling a crop duster, but that doesn’t matter.  Don’t misunderstand me – I don’t think that they should have to get an inspection, because I believe that no one should get an inspection.  This segment of vehicles is the very reason a law like this exists – but it is saved with a broad stroke of policy.  Thus, the law has nothing to do with clean air.

If your vehicle is 1975-1995, they test what is coming out of your tailpipe

tailpipe

I mean, if there is any true test of what a car emits, I’d say vehicular colonoscopy would be the way to go.  The only real problem with that is that it would be fairly easy to fake.  All an offender would have to do is redirect the emissions, or at least disburse them so that only a portion reach the tail pipe.  Heck – if your car is in bad enough shape, it’ll do it for you!  A few simple cracks in your exhaust, and voila!  You’ve got yourself a non-polluting golden chariot.  A better test would be to seal the vehicle in a room with multiple sensors, and let it run for an extending period of time.  But I’m definitely not requesting that.

Oh, and there’s also a visual inspection of the gas cap.  Because biased human eyes are the best way to tell if a gas tank is sealed up tight.

If your vehicle is post-1996, they simply query your computer

sick-computer

Here’s where my problem occurred.  I have a problem with my transmission, which meant that my service engine soon light came on.  I’d often heard that if your engine light was on, you would fail an inspection no matter the reason for the light.  My transmission slipping, though definitely not giving me a perfectly smooth ride, doesn’t shelf me in with those nasty pre-75’ers, or those pesky pre-1995’ers!  If you took an an apples to apples comparison, my Blazer would still emit far less than those.  Again – not saying I can’t improve it – but I’m simply arguing that this testing standard doesn’t actually look for emissions.  A better test would still be the equivalent of a rectal thermometer.

Supposedly, if I spend over $200 trying to fix the problem, I get an automatic pass.  I can’t confirm that, as I’ve only heard it from friends of friends of friends.  But if it’s true…

Semis are exempt

semi-pollution

Whaaa?  I don’t know how many times I’ve seen a semi, driving down the road, all of a sudden belch out black smoke for a few seconds.  Obviously, that’s not a special air freshener…  Once again – I’m not out to pummel tractor-trailers into submission – they guzzle tremendous amounts of diesel in the name of keeping America running, and kudos to them for it.  But – wouldn’t you say that’s where a lot of our transportation pollution comes from?   The cabs fit in a weight class (over 10,500lbs) that simply doesn’t need to be tested.  Perhaps I should add a few tons to my Blazer, then I wouldn’t need to get an ok from the gov to keep driving, amiright?

And my biggest beef…

It forces thousands of cars in metropolitan areas to idle, emitting needless pollution

traffic-jam

I waited in a line of at least 50 cars for about an hour (the line was out to the middle of the road before turning in), and the two options were to cut off your vehicle and start it every few minutes, or just sit idling.  Naturally, everyone left them running.  And I don’t think it would actually help pollute less if they did the ol’ start/stop method.  But my point is that – to avoid traffic pollution – they are creating hubs of traffic jams for solid 8-hour days.  Traffic jams that would simply not exist if there were no emissions testing.  Sure – people might still be driving during that time – but it’s an hour (plus travel to and from) of extra pollution that every vehicle in a metropolitan area has to cough up.  (pun intended)

Ok, so it’s completely inefficient – but how is it government corruption?

This is where the crazy conspiracy theory David comes into play.

Sure, you could say that, even though it’s not productive in any other way, emissions testing creates jobs.  There were at least 6 “technicians” working there while I was there, who I’m assuming just make minimum wage, or thereabouts.  For the sake of ease, let’s say they make $10/hour, and the test itself costs $10.  That means that, as long as they have one car per hour, they’re paying their own salary.  But it doesn’t take an hour – it’s only a 5 minute process, so they might get through 10 in an hour, which equates to $100; minus $10 for the tech, and the company nets $90 per tech.  With I’d say an average of 3 techs working throughout the month (I went on the last day of the month, so they had more schmucks like myself and more techs than normal), the company itself makes a monthly $518,400 (90/hour*3 techs*8 hours*20 business days in a month*12 months).

Hmm…  That’s good money.  And that’s only one testing station.  I might be off a bit (they actually operate 11 hours a day, plus saturdays, but the volume probably evens out), but since there are a few testing stations in my county, which means it’s possibly a $1.5 million generator.  I assume that the company that does this is owned by a politician’s brother-in-law or campaign contributor.  What other reasons would they have to create a needless law that requires an extra $10 tax on vehicle renewals anyhow?  I’m not going to go into any sort of “keeping tabs on citizens” (they track your milage, and you have to get out of your vehicle while they get in there to do their tests, etc), because I don’t really think that’s going on.  But if I were a bit crazier…

What about you?  Is there anyone else that thinks this is a big pile of trash covered in political spray paint?  Or is everyone else happy to pay them to tell us that our cars are acceptable in their sight?

Preparation

We were incredibly lucky to get our house and property.

(Actually, that’s not true… I don’t believe in luck – I believe whole-heartedly in the sovereignty of God. More on that later, I’m sure)

The House

Beautiful on the outside, the inside of the house is what we describe as wonky.

won·ky (wäNGkē) – adjective, informal
weird, whacked out, messed up, not working for no definable reason
(Urban Dictionary)

It was originally built without any bedrooms. Years after it was built, the previous owners’ health prevented them from going up the stairs to their loft where they slept, so they converted a garage into a bedroom. And it feels like a garage converted into a bedroom.

We obviously knew this going in, so we were totally prepared to renovate by adding bedrooms and fixing bathrooms, etc. What we were not prepared for is the process of getting the county government to approve permits for adding bedrooms.

We’ve been in the house for close to three months, and we’re still waiting on getting permits for changing our septic system to handle more bedrooms. Mind you – not the actual work, but permission from them to possibly do work. We have to have our soil tested, have duplicated soil sites the same size as the proposed septic system.

We had soil testing done well over a month ago, and the results were sent to the county, but their response was basically “meh.” They said the duplicate sites weren’t big enough. So – even though we have enough room for the septic system itself, the duplicated areas didn’t seem big enough. Then the guy said “you have seven acres, I’m sure you’ve got it.”

Then just give me the freaking permits.

I don’t get the requirements here… If I were to have an inadequate septic system, it would not affect them in any way. You and I both know that if there was an issue with my tank overflowing, I’d just dig a hole in the backyard while we fixed the problem. But I guess they’re just trying to save absolutely everyone from themselves, because it’s not fair to me to let me make my own decisions. But I digress.

After a month, the soil guys are back out today, and hopefully we’ll get that part squared away soon.

The Property

The house is nice (or – will be nice), and that’s what excited my wife when we first found it. But what gets me pumped up is the Land. (Yes – land is different than Land) I envision animals, gardens, orchards, etc, all over the place, and that means I’m happy to put up with a stressful time of renovating the house.

One unfortunate thing about our land is that it’s incredibly rocky. I don’t mean when you dig a hole, you find a handful of gravel; rather, there is a rock quarry about a mile away, and we have a natural rock patio behind the house. (As such, I realize that the soil guys have their work cut out for them)

Another unfortunate thing about our land is that the previous owners (or whoever “maintained” it for them) dumped garbage literally everywhere. There are a number of rock openings that someone deemed as landfill areas, I guess to avoid the two mile drive to the local dump. It amazes me that someone would live in such a beautiful area and treat it so poorly. I’ve got a truckload of junk that I need to haul off, and I’ve barely scratched the surface.

My dad let me borrow Big Bertha – his name for a mower/bushhog/beast that will tear through underbrush like it’s cotton candy. I’ve been on it for probably at least an hour a day for the past month, and the overgrown forest now looks like a state park. (Disregarding the landfills, of course)

You might say to yourself “Hey – I thought this guy wanted to go off grid! Why is he using machinery and gasoline to devour wonderful trees?” This is Geek Off Grid, mind you.

I love technology.

My plan for getting off the grid includes solar panels (which I already have – more on that later), Arduino projects, homemade generators and general nerdiness. More than survivalism, I want to be self-sufficient and self-sustaining. My homestead will be similar to one that you could have seen 200 years ago, but upgraded.

Homesteading 2.0

We’ve got a long way to go on both the house and property, but I’m enjoying the process. (Well – the process outside; not so much the process of getting permits)